Posted inLiving with a catheter

After eight years of using a urinary catheter, TURP is planned due to improved bladder function

In May 2017 I had a serious urine retention episode -- unable to pee, more bluntly put -- that kicked off a lengthy period of depression and anxiety due to the difficulty I had with needing to insert a catheter five times a day, since I couldn't urinate on my own. Not at all. Not even a drop. My urologist told me that smooth bladder muscle doesn't recover from an injury as regular muscle can. So I'd need to use an intermittent catheter for the rest of my life. Which wasn't a cheery prospect. But as the years passed, I…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

I’m now quite confident that diet affects how easily I can insert a urinary catheter

A bit over six months ago I theorized in a blog post, "Diet could play a role when having a problem inserting a urinary catheter."  I asked my urologist if he thought diet could play a role in the difficulty I sometimes have inserting a catheter. His answer: "Maybe." Not very helpful, as that left it to me to figure out my own answer.  After a lot of experimenting with different foods (I'm a health-minded 73 year old vegetarian), I'm pretty confident that yes, at least for me, diet does affect how easy it is for me to insert a…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

Decaf coffee irritates the bladder because of acidity, as well as some caffeine

Since for a bit more than five years I've had to use a urinary catheter to pee, aside from the small amount I can release on my own, coffee has been a continuing concern for me. For decades prior to having my bladder go on strike -- technical term, becoming atonic -- I was a coffee addict. I'd drink 4-5 cups a day, at just about any time. After starting intermittent catheterization five times a day, and knowing that the caffeine in coffee stimulates the production of urine in many people, including me, at first I split the difference and…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

I offer advice to someone new to using a urinary catheter

Today I heard from a woman whose 56 year old husband had his bladder go atonic, dysfunctional, two months ago. Understandably, he's suffering both physically and psychologically given this abrupt change in his life. She had read the essay I wrote for 180 Medical, which supplies my catheters, that had the not-very-cheery title, "My urinary catheter-related depression and anxiety." I was asked if I had any resources, advice, or support I could suggest. Well, here's the thoughts that come immediately to mind. I'll use this blog post as a reply to the woman, copying it into my email reply. I'll…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

Diet could play a role when having a problem inserting a urinary catheter

I've been doing the intermittent urinary catheterization thing five times a day since my bladder became atonic in May 2017, a bit over five years ago.  Or as I like to say, my bladder went on strike back then and hasn't returned to work since. At least, not very well. I can pee some on my own, but not enough to stop using a catheter to empty my bladder. At times I've suffered from some pretty severe anxiety and depression, which I described in an essay 180 Medical asked me to write. I've also wondered whether anyone cares about my…
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Posted inHealth Living with a catheter

My first counseling session: “I feel like you heard me”

I could have saved the $40 insurance co-pay by taking the advice of this cartoon and letting our dog make me feel better, instead of going to my first Salem Health counseling session. But after seeing Wayne Halle, a MSW counselor, I'm convinced that I made the right decision to take my problems to a human, rather than a canine. I was referred to Halle in late December after I told my family physician that I found a recent glaucoma diagnosis to be more than a little disturbing, especially when layered on top of a couple of other annoying health…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

Facing Catheter-Related Depression: Brian’s Story

Today 180 Medical published the essay I wrote for them on their blog, calling it "Facing Catheter-Related Depression: Brian's  Story."  They decided not to put my email address in, though I said this would be fine with me. In case anyone wants to contact me about what I wrote, my email address is in the right sidebar, or click here.  The blog post looks great -- nicely laid out. There were a few edits to shorten the piece, but I didn't even notice what got left out. Jessica Flint's introduction was well put. It’s not often talked about, but the…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

My urinary catheter-related depression and anxiety

Recently I finished a 2,500 word essay for the consideration of 180 Medical, the firm that supplies me with urinary catheters. After I got a message from 180 Medical saying that they welcome essays about how people experience using a catheter, I wrote back saying I'm interested in this, having written a bunch of blog posts about my life with a catheter.Download 180 Medical essay PDF (I've also copied in the essay below.) A marketing specialist with 180 Medical read some of those posts and suggested I write about my catheter-related depression and anxiety. It took me quite a while…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

My routine for using a pre-lubricated catheter

Since May 2017 I've used a catheter after having a urinary retention episode that showed my bladder had become atonic, a fancy word for not working any more as it should, likely due to my lengthy history of an enlarged prostate. I haven't written a whole lot about my experiences with a catheter. Recently I decided I should, starting with a post that has a rather plaintive title, "I've learned a lot about using a catheter. But does anyone care?" In that post I listed some questions that I wanted to address in other blog posts, regardless of whether anyone…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

SpeediCath Flex Coude Pro is the best male catheter

Since May 2017 I've used a catheter after having a urinary retention episode that showed my bladder had become atonic, a fancy word for not working any more as it should, likely due to my lengthy history of an enlarged prostate. I haven't written a whole lot about my experiences with a catheter. Recently I decided I should, starting with a post that has a rather plaintive title, "I've learned a lot about using a catheter. But does anyone care?" In that post I listed some questions that I wanted to address in other blog posts, regardless of whether anyone…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

I’ve learned a lot about using a catheter. But does anyone care?

In May 2017 I had a urinary retention episode while on vacation in central Oregon that kicked off my life with a catheter at age 68. Now I'm 72 -- still doing the intermittent catheterization thing five times a day. It took me about three months before I was able to first write about my situation in "Given my peeing problem, be warned about asking 'How are things going?"" Since, I've written fifteen other posts about my life with a catheter. That's a thin (thankfully) plastic tube that is inserted into the urethra and thence into the bladder to remove…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter Salem

Misfits belong in Salem’s theatre community (and elsewhere)

Misfits don't fit in. Except where they do. Like, in Salem's theatre community. There was a lot to like about today's City Club program, "On Stage: Salem's Vibrant Theater Community." But what I'm going to focus on is one thing Lisa Joyce, executive director of Pentacle Theatre, said. She told us that misfits find a home in theatre, because everyone is welcome there. I absolutely loved those words. And now, having written that five word sentence, I'm having trouble explaining why. So for the moment I'm going to take a detour around my personal feeling about misfits and return to it…
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Posted inLiving with a catheter

Men’s “locker room talk” not conducive to openness about health problems

I had my annual physical today, Medicare variety, since I'm 70. I'm fortunate to have a family physician who is caring, compassionate, and willing to talk with me for as long as is necessary when I have a concern or question. Oh, the physician is also a woman. Which almost goes without saying from the description I just offered up. I'm not saying that male doctors always are businesslike and brusque. But most of the physicians of my sex I've gone to have been quite a bit less pleasant than my current family doctor. She and I talked about my…
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Posted inHome life Living with a catheter

I’m trying to cultivate my experiencing self, rather than my remembering self

There's nothing wrong with memories, nor with anticipations -- which basically are imaginings of future events which could become memories. If we couldn't remember the past or envision the future, we wouldn't be fully human. I've read about people who have a brain defect that leaves them almost totally in the present, and they can barely function. But as I wrote about yesterday on my Church of the Churchless blog, I'm trying to be more attuned to the present moment.  Partly this is because I've developed a chronic health problem that makes it tough for me to travel. So for…
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Posted inHumor Living with a catheter

New life goal: be a humorous mindful Taoist stay-at-home

I find many things weird. Most of them reside within my own cranium. After all, that's really the only place weirdness resides -- in a human mind. Like, mine. One of my weirdnesses is that even though I'm an avid blogger, for the past year I've largely avoided writing about the Central Fact of my life since May 2017. Namely, my 68 year-old bladder deciding to call it quits during a visit to central Oregon, which led through a series of increasingly disturbing events to my current state of being an Old Man Who Has to Pee Via a Catheter. …
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Posted inCurrent affairs Health Living with a catheter

Between the black and white of suicide, there’s a gray area

The recent suicides of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade have gotten people talking about the problem of taking one's own life. That's good.  But I don't feel like we're talking about an important issue that is almost a taboo topic: the gray area between (1) the black badness of people killing themselves when there are better options available to them, and (2) the white goodness of people taking control of their death when they are suffering and only have a few months or less to live. What I see as a gray in-between area is when a person considers that…
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Posted inHome life Living with a catheter

In my final hypnosis session I meet the V.P. in charge of my goals

My sessions with Emily Cahal of Salem Hypnosis Solutions have been delightfully varied. Today, my fourth session, and the last for a while, featured me meeting the Vice-President of my psyche in charge of achieving goals.  (I've described the three previous sessions here, here, and here.) Per usual, before the actual hypnosis session Emily and I talked about how things have been going with me since we last met. Naturally the focus was on how I've been dealing with my chronic health problem, a bladder condition, since that was my motivation for giving hypnosis a try. I told her that…
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Posted inHome life Living with a catheter

My third time is a purple charm with Emily Cahal of Salem Hypnosis Solutions

Today I had my third hypnosis session with Emily Cahal. I've blogged about the first two sessions here and here. It left me feeling good. Not that the first sessions had me feeling bad. Quite the opposite. I simply felt like today we went a bit deeper into my psyche, which might be a result of me becoming more familiar with Cahal's style and with hypnosis in general.  I like how Cahal blends traditional counseling with hypnotherapy. First we talked for about fifteen minutes about what's been going on with me during the past week. My focus, of course, was…
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Posted inHealth Living with a catheter

My second hypnosis session got me way small

As I said in my blog post about my first hypnosis session with Emily Cahal of Salem Hypnosis Solutions, we had to make a decision about which way to proceed. She told me that there were two basic ways we could go with hypnosis. Basically, one way would focus on my particular presenting problem, so to speak. The other way would be more general, delving into my habitual way of dealing with life's problems.  Interestingly, as we chatted before beginning the second session, Cahal indicated that though we went the more general way last week, she favored going the more…
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Posted inHealth Living with a catheter

Here’s how my first hypnosis session went

Today I had my first real hypnosis experience with Emily Cahal of Salem Hypnosis Solutions. Back in college I'd dabbled in self-hypnosis as taught by a Yoga teacher I was studying with. And I'd seen a form of "show business" hypnosis during an assembly at a high school where I briefly was a teacher's aide following my college graduation. A hypnotist did his thing on stage with a female student, then told her to go find Paul Newman in the audience. She walked by me, looking into the bleachers, then leapt into the second row where I was sitting and…
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