Why I think “Our Last Tango” is such a great dance movie

Thanks to Netflix, recently my wife and I enjoyed watching "Our Last Tango," a documentary of sorts about the passionate relationship between two highly talented Tango dancers, Maria Nieves Rego and Juan Carlos Copes. I say of sorts, because the film bounces back and forth between footage of Maria and Juan in the present day (the movie was released in 2016) when they were 80 and 83, respectively, videos of them performing when younger, and reenactments of memorable moments in their relationship by four skilled Tango dancers -- two for their early years together, and two for their later years.…

Love this fat guy dancing video… inspiring!

Thanks to Lora Lamon of Salem's RJ Dance Studio for sharing this marvelous video. On her Facebook post Lora said: All you guys who think you're too cool to dance . . . . get over yourselves. Here's a guy who is totally comfortable in his own skin. I laughed. I cried. I applauded. I LOVED IT !! Yeah, me too. The fat guy is a really good dancer. And I bet, a really good person. He sure brought some joy into my life today.  

West Coast Swing is our new dancing thing

We live on the West Coast. We like swing dancing. But my wife and I have had a tough time getting into the West Coast Swing style. Over the years we've had several lessons. Even a four-week series. The dance just never "set in" with us. Until recently we'd forgotten almost everything we'd learned about West Coast Swing. So when we'd go to a open social dance night at the RJ Dance Studio here in Salem, and the DJ would call out "west coast swing" as a new tune started, we'd sit down and watch other people dance what looked to…

Young girls who dance like Tina Turner. What’s up?

Today my wife, Laurel, and I got our first look at big-time children's dance competition. We spent most of the day watching the Los Angeles regionals of The American Dance Awards, held in Lake Elsinore, California at Lakeside High School. Our four-year old granddaughter apparently was the youngest contestant, dancing in two six-and-under categories (small group tap and small group jazz). We loved every moment of the dancing. My daughter was fearful that we'd get bored with the all day competition. Early on she slipped me her car keys, figuring that Laurel and I would want to head someplace else…

Dance tip is a life lesson: seek quality, not quantity

Learning ballroom dancing with a partner is a cheap way to get some psychotherapy. A dance instructor usually charges less than a counselor. Plus, you get to listen to music and have fun while you're getting insights into yourself. I've blogged about my fascination with leading and following, which touches on the core of male/female relating. But today my wife and I had a dance lesson that focused on how I relate with Me, an even more intimate relationship. We've been taking some private lessons with Salem's Debra Seeck, also known as Mz. Jitterbug. She's given us some good Salsa…

I jump back into Argentine Tango, again a beginner

For me, Argentine Tango offers up a glimpse of what it must be like to have mild Alzheimer's. I've had a bunch of classes in this challenging dance style, starting over five years ago (see "We tango, and also get tangled"). Yet when my wife and I are in an off phase of our off-and-on relationship with Argentine Tango, almost instantly I forget just about everything I knew about how to dance it. The main reason is that Argentine Tango is the most spontaneous and unpatterned of partner dances. I'm at least mildly competent in quite a few ballroom styles…

Learning the Hustle offers lesson in living

For me, learning how to dance means a lot more than just gaining some skills in moving around the hardwood to music. After all, life is a dance. And dancing is part of life. Last night Laurel and I had a private Hustle lesson with Lora at Salem's RJ Dance Studio. Lora has an impressive background in dance and music. At this stage in our dancing lessons, her central critique of me -- which is entirely accurate -- is that often I don't follow the beat or rhythm of a dance. I'm pretty good at getting steps down, though. With…

Ballroom dancing restores yin-yang balance

Guys, if you need a reason to take ballroom dance lessons, here it is: the woman has to do what you want. You lead. The woman follows. End of story.Until you get off the dance floor. Then your relationship goes back to normal. But as our instructor likes to say, "On the hardwood, the man holds the remote control; once a couple leaves the studio and steps on the rug, anything goes."Well, over 99% of the time I hold the remote control at home also. And I do the car driving about that percentage as well. It just seems natural…

Bliss: front row seats at Champions of the Dance

Last month I bought myself a birthday present: front row center seats for Champions of the Dance, which we saw last night at the Hult Center in Eugene.Excellent ticket-buying decision. There's a time to be at least a few rows back in a large auditorium, so you can get the stage's big picture. But not for a professional ballroom dancing show which mostly featured one couple onstage at once.We hugely enjoyed Champions of the Dance. The quality of the performers didn't seem quite up to the level of the finalists in The American Ballroom Challenge, which we've watched on PBS…

Tai Chi African dancing…only in Salem

Well, that was different. And fun. Doing Tai Chi to an African'ish drum beat. Learning a few Zambian dance steps from Mary, a visitor to our class who is finishing up a Ph.D. in fisheries science from Penn State.Mary's education has been supported by the Elizabeth Bowers Zambia Education Fund. Gerry, a fellow Tai Chi student, and his wife started the Fund in memory of their daughter. It's a great cause that Laurel and I contribute to each year. A little $$$ goes a long way, when its helping Zambian girls get an education.Mary gamely followed along with unfamiliar Tai…

Ballroom Tango taking the lead from Argentine Tango

Only for Laurel and me, I have to say right off -- before the title of this post sends Argentine Tango aficionados into a frenzy. Many of those who dance the Argentine version of Tango are really into it, which is great. What the world needs now, as always, is more dancing fools. When the economic times are bad, troubles are easily forgotten when the music starts up and two bodies begin to move in harmony (or, in our case, semi-harmony). We've just taken another turn on our dancing path. After some West Coast Swing classes we jumped into Argentine…

“Naughty toddler” Tango teaches a life lesson

What to do when life pushes you around? Resist? Give in? Something else? Great questions. Because unless you're in a coma, or have attained Buddha nature, every day there's going to be times when you feel like life is a naughty toddler who screams No! at your oh-so-reasonable request. Last week's Argentine Tango class taught me a valuable lesson, adding on to what I learned from instructor Elizabeth Wartluft before (check out her blog). She had us practice "Naughty Toddler" Tango. Usually in dance the follower does her best to comply with her partner's lead. But in this exercise the…

Tango loosens up Salem (and me)

There's a lot of reasons to like Argentine Tango. And dancing in general. Letting go, embracing your inner whatever, freely flowing – what's not to like? Last night Laurel and I went to our first class being offered by the Argentine Tango Salem community. We took up Argentine Tango in 2006, but never felt comfortable dancing what we'd learned (a blog post sample of our initial Tango journey is here, here, and here). So we're making a fresh start. Laurel likes American Tango more than Argentine, a style we took up last year. But I'm intrigued by the unique spontaneity…

Dancing through life the Argentine Tango way

Is life a dance? Is dancing life? Sure.

We find a partner. We lose a partner. We stumble. We move smoothly. We forget where we’re supposed to go. We get on track again.

Life is reflected in every style of dance. But many see Argentine Tango as the best representation of life. A few years ago I blogged about how “I’m learning to Tango with life.”

Still am. Learning.

Last Saturday, another lesson. Lora, our RJ Dance Studio instructor, arranged for Rachel Lidskog to come down from Portland and teach two Argentine Tango workshops.

What a delight. Especially when Rachel partnered up with Lora and demonstrated how to move. These ladies can. Move. (Here’s a YouTube video of Rachel waltzing in a competition.)

An accomplished dancer looks danceish even when he or she is just standing in one spot, talking. Or moving from place to place, walking. It isn’t anything magical, really, though years of training are reflected in every stance and move.

It’s basically presence. Being aware. Conscious of yourself, the rhythm you’re hearing, the person you’re connected with, others in the room.

Rachel is a marvelously positive woman. I’m sure she has her down days, but you’d never know it from her unfailing infectious smile, encouraging words, and warm energy. She spoke of chi, something I hear a lot about in my Tai Chi classes.

There’s no way to tie chi down in words, but one way it manifests is as intention – a passion that another Tango instructor, Matt, spoke about. Without it, this energy of life, we’re living at half-throttle, idling through our years.

Last weekend’s Argentine Tango workshops helped bring Laurel and me up to a higher dancing speed, though we’re still cruising along at low RPM’s compared to experienced dancers.

Yet in three hours Rachel revved up us quite a bit, along with a pleasingly large number of other classmates (showing that sleepy Salem is ready to Tango, more than vicariously).

Here’s some of her general Argentine Tango tips that are more obviously applicable to life. I’ll share some Tango specifics in a continuation to this post.

–Connection between the leader and follower is all important, whether you’re in close embrace or farther apart. Feel the intention of the leader and the response of the follower.

–A leader has to be decisive. Don’t hesitate. A wishy-washy lead is more likely to result in stepped on feet or a stumble, not less likely. Move confidently into the follower’s space; she (usually the follower is a woman) will get out of the way.

–Argentine Tango is fully led and followed, unlike patterned dances. There is no set pattern to Argentine Tango. It’s spontaneous, moving to the rhythmic intention of the moment.

–Thus the follower shouldn’t anticipate. Even though almost always this move follows that move, “almost” allows for the leader to go in another direction. Feel what is really happening, not what you expect to happen.

–Argentine Tango is the only dance style that can be danced to any sort of music: waltz, foxtrot, rhumba, salsa, nightclub, and so on. It’s flexibility flows from its spontaneity and lack of a regular rhythm of its own.

–The essence of Tango is simply walking. As Carlos, another instructor, told us: “Guys, Tango is simple. It’s just walking with the woman in a way that will make her fall in love with you.” (For the duration of the dance, at least.)

Read on for some Argentine Tango specifics.

Salem Tangos, vicariously

Wow! Last night sleepy Salem became, briefly, a Tango town. Unfortunately, it was only within the walls of the Elsinore Theatre, where a touring troupe, "Forever Tango," performed. Laurel and I took quite a few Argentine Tango lessons in 2006. We've forgotten much of what we learned. And watching the amazing dancers from our mezzanine seats made us realize that whatever we know about Tango is a tiny spark compared to the sensual firestorm they threw out. A review said: If you feel that tango is just another dance, then this show may not be for you. But if it…

I’m dance-blogging in Russia!

Here's a great example why blogging is so satisfying. I can go to my Outlook inbox and find an email from a guy who runs a Russian dance blog. Dear Brian! My name is Ivan Makarov. I am from Russia. I am webmaster of the http://ballroom.org.ru So I am writing to let you know that I like your dance related posts. Thank you for your writing. I've found your site via google and decided to translate some of your posts to Russian, for posting on my own site. What a kick. Ivan chose to share my "Tango, where men lead…

Caution: dancing can lead to divorce

During our Foxtrot class, Lora, the instructor, talked about how dancing usually is looked upon as a way for couples to come closer together. But it doesn't always work out that way, she said. If a man and a woman are having problems before they begin learning ballroom dancing, whatever strains exist in their relationship are going to brought to the fore on the dance floor. Laurel and I have been taking dance classes for just two years. But already we've seen a bunch of different approaches couples use when the moves aren't flowing like they should. Laughter. The preferred…

Rainy Oregon tango dog walk video

It all came together today. My Flip Video. Rain. Dog walk.Tango music. Thank you, Gotan Project, for "Paris, Texas." I needed a fairly lengthy Tango track to suit the misty gray mood of a seriously damp Oregon Saturday. "Paris, Texas" fit the bill. Tango, because one of my dance instructors told me that with waltz, smiling is expected. With Tango, how you feel is how you look. No "should's." Rain starts to get irritating this time of year. I'm tired of forty degrees and wet. Followed by colder and wetter. But today my goal was to look at my usual…

The one place where men always lead

From my male perspective, it's nice that there's still one place in this modern, egalitarian world where men always lead and women always follow. The ballroom dance floor. At least, that's the way it's supposed to work, as Lora (our RJ Dance Studio instructor) explained to us a few days ago. We're taking a beginning Foxtrot class. Laurel and I have taken quite a few classes from Lora, but most of the other Foxtrotters were new to dancing, so she went over the basics. Including this weird and wacky notion: the woman should do whatever the man wants – unless…