Dems should have locked John Kerry away

John, oh John. What was going through your unthinking mind? One week before the election. All you have to do is keep your mouth shut and not get in the way of the rising Democratic tide. But, no. You can't resist attempting a lame joke about how if college students aren’t smart and don’t study hard, they’ll end up stuck in Iraq. Understood: you were trying to say that Bush is a fool who did just that. A Kerry aide told CNN that the prepared statement, which had been designed to criticize President Bush, "was mangled in delivery." Kerry was…

I copy Laurel’s ballot. Are we lawbreakers?

Aren’t you envious, rest of the country? We voters here in Oregon, every last one of us, get to fill out our ballots in the comfort of our homes. Then we stick them in the mail, civic duty having been completed almost effortlessly. I make it even easier on myself by copying my wife’s ballot. Last night she sat at the kitchen table, thick voter’s pamphlet in hand, reading the qualifications of every obscure candidate and the pros and cons of ballot measures that we were undecided about. This morning, per our tradition, I picked up her not-yet-sealed ballot, laid…

German polizei make Portland-area police look like sissies

How is it that German police can disarm a man wielding a samurai sword without hurting him, by using a broomstick, while Washington county police shoot and kill a teenager holding a three-inch fishing knife, and an unarmed mentally ill man dies after three Portland policemen rough him up? According to a news report, in Hamburg, Germany a man swung a samurai sword violently at police as they tried to disarm him. If this happened in Oregon almost certainly he would have been filled with bullets. But the polizei used a broomstick to subdue him. Check out the videotape. It…

Oregonians now reject Measure 37

A few years of watching the Measure 37 nightmare unfold has turned Oregonians off to this ill-considered effort to trash the state’s land use laws. A poll finds that Oregon voters would now reject Measure 37 by a wide margin (48 percent “no” to only 29 percent “yes”). So much for the flimsy argument that Oregonians support mining in a national monument and putting a gravel pit in a residential neighborhood—two real-life examples of Measure 37 claims—just because it passed with 61 percent of the vote in 2004. As I noted in a previous post, voters were conned by Oregonians…

Portland Oregonian didn’t endorse Saxton–one guy did

The more I learn about the Oregonian’s endorsement of Ron Saxton for governor, the screwier it looks.

Sunday the Editorial Page Editor, Bob Caldwell, revealed that he alone made the call on the Saxton endorsement, even though a majority (six) of the ten-member board leaned toward Kulongoski.

So this is Screwy Factoid #1. The gubernatorial endorsement of the state’s largest newspaper should have said, “Bob Caldwell favors Ron Saxton for governor.” One guy, one personal opinion.

Instead, the editorial ended with:

It is a leap of faith to endorse a former school board chairman over a sitting governor. If all was well, we would recommend that voters re-elect Kulongoski. But the times demand a fresh look at Oregon’s problems and Saxton brings an open, independent mind to the task. We recommend that voters select him as their next governor.

We? There’s no “We”! There’s “Me,” Bob Caldwell. If a vote had been taken of the editorial board members, it would have been 6-4 in favor of Kulonogoski. Or, since one of the six was a wishy-washy supporter of the incumbent, 5-4 with an abstention.

Kings and queens get to refer to themselves as the royal “We.” And editorial writers can, too, as Wikipedia points out, when he or she is a spokesman for the publication. But in this case Caldwell was speaking for a minority of the editorial board.

This should have been revealed in the endorsement, not after the fact. In today’s Oregonian, letter writer Helena Wolfe tells it like it should have been:

It was shocking to learn that the endorsement of Ron Saxton by The Oregonian editorial board came down to the personal preferences of Editorial Page Editor Bob Caldwell, even though the board narrowly favored Ted Kulongoski (“So, who made the Saxton decision — and who did not,” Oct. 22).

Given the close split among board members, abstaining from endorsing either candidate would have been the more responsible action for the newspaper to take.

As things stand, Saxton now has a soundbite to use in his advertising, and Kulongoski’s stance has been irreparably damaged. The Oregonian should have just presented the strengths and weaknesses of each candidate and honestly told the public that the board was too divided to make an endorsement.

My Screwy Factoid #2 cost me $2.95 to discover. This is how much my VISA card got charged to obtain an archived file of an October 10, 2004 Oregonian piece by the public editor, “How the choice was made to endorse Kerry.”

But it was worth three bucks to read about how the editorial board’s presidential endorsement process worked two years ago. Some excerpts:

No vote is taken on endorsements; instead, Caldwell looks for a consensus to emerge and makes the call. In 2000, five members had pushed for Bush. But three of those five, including Caldwell and Rowe, were supporting or leaning toward the Democrat this time. Only Stickel and columnist David Reinhard ended up arguing that the newspaper should endorse Bush.

…Stickel [the publisher] was disappointed by the decision but says he respects it. Although he could have overridden the choice, he considers that foolish. “Why would you have an editor of the editorial board, why would you have six associate editors, if you’re going to sit there and tell them what to do?” he says.

Good question.

I wish Bob Caldwell would have asked it of himself before he overrode the gubernatorial preference of a majority of the editorial board. What’s foolish for one overrider is foolish for another. Stickel was smart enough to recognize that an endorsement based on one person’s personal opinion is meaningless.

Which, we now know, the Saxton endorsement is.

[I’ll include the full 2004 article below, thereby getting more of my $2.95 money’s worth.]

“Little Miss Sunshine,” a tribute to dysfunction

A VW bus that has to be pushed or rolled to start it. A family comprised of wildly disparate members, including a heroin-snorting grandpa, a platitude-spouting motivational speaker father, and a Nietzsche-obsessed son who hasn’t said a word for nine months. What’s not to like about “Little Miss Sunshine”? We saw the movie last Friday, thanks to Salem Cinema’s decision to bring it back for another run. It’s a feel-good tribute to eccentric dysfunction, something I know more than a little about. Automotively, I felt right at home watching the family of Olive, an aspiring seven year-old beauty queen, coax…

Republicans play political games with national security. Again.

As if there weren’t enough reasons to toss Republicans out of office come November, the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, Peter Hoekstra, has offered up another one. Today it was admitted on Fox News that the suspension of a Democratic staffer for supposedly leaking the National Intelligence Estimate (NIE) is purely political. There’s no evidence that this guy (reportedly Larry Hanauer) did anything wrong. Thousands of people had access to the NIE, which embarrassed the Bush Administration by concluding that the Iraq war is fanning the flames of terrorism and breeding deep resentment of the United States in the…

Today, Suttle Lake beauty trumps politics

Come November, vote Democratic. And if you’re in Oregon, vote “no” on every Oregon ballot measure. [Update: Oops. When I impulsively wrote the above I'd forgotten about Measure 44, which expands the Oregon Prescription Drug Program. It deserves a "yes." Otherwise, I still advise "no" on the other measures. See my post, "I copy Laurel's ballot. Are we lawbreakers?"] There. I’m done my minimal progressive duty and am done with politics for this blogging day. I’ll turn to photos of our recent walk around central Oregon’s Suttle Lake, a much more pleasant manifestation of physical reality. The big fire a…

My virtual colonoscopy is a walk in the park (and to the toilet)

Nobody other than a masochist says, “Oh joy, I’m going to have a colonoscopy today!” So I’ve resisted having an endoscope snaked up my butt, even while sedated. I’d heard horror stories about people who suffered a lot of pain during a colonoscopy but were too zonked out to effectively communicate what was going on. Then I learned about virtual (or CT) colonoscopy. It’s non-invasive (yes!) and doesn’t require sedation. Like most things medical there’s debate over whether conventional or virtual colonoscopy is better. A 2003 study reported in the New England Journal of Medicine concluded: “CT colonoscopy with the…

Oregonian’s illogical Saxton endorsement

Bizarre. That describes today’s endorsement of gubernatorial candidate Ron Saxton by the Portland Oregonian. I usually find that the newspaper’s editorials make sense, even if I don’t agree with their position. But that wasn’t the case here. The Loaded Orygun blog sums up my attitude exactly: “The O has lost its fucking mind.” How is it possible for the Oregonian to start off with this rendition of the state’s problems, then endorse Republican Ron Saxton? This state has slipped and fallen. School funding is below the national average. Oregon is near the bottom in public support of universities. The number…

SearchMash, my new favorite search engine

Be sure to check out SearchMash, Google’s lightly publicized search testing ground. I just learned about it a few days and already I’m hooked. It’s a Zen-ified Google. Simpler, purer, more direct. Just start typing anywhere and you’re typing into the search box. Cool. No click and type. Do a web page search and some images often will pop up on the right side. No need to do a separate image search. Nice. (But my “Brian Hines” search revealed a guy who doesn’t look a whole lot like me.) Get to the end of the first ten search results, click…

“Property Wrongs” report about Measure 37 features our neighborhood

Supporters of Oregon’s Measure 37, which trashed our state’s land use laws, like to talk about property rights. But now Oregon is facing property wrongs caused by the inherent unfairness of Measure 37, which created a privileged class of landowner. Such is the conclusion of a report, “Property Wrongs: Lessons from Oregon on ‘property rights’” that was released today by Seattle’s Sightline Institute. It features six case studies of the ill effects of Measure 37. Our Spring Lake Estates neighborhood is one of them. As I described in my previous post, a hydrogeologist has found that commonly-owned Spring Lake is…

Behold the ugly face of Measure 37

Here’s what Oregon’s Measure 37 looks like. An 82 lot subdivision next to our Spring Lake Estates neighborhood. This is a map of the first phase, 43 lots. Which means 43 homes, with 43 wells, on land intended for exclusive farm use that already has limited groundwater. Crazy. If you voted for Measure 37, which exempted some property owners from complying with the state’s land use laws, you probably thought the face of Measure 37 was Dorothy English—a 92 year-old who, ads in favor of the measure said, just wanted the right to develop her land so she could give…

Black Butte Ranch Restaurant: We love you, but…

Sometimes tough love is needed. Straight talk. Telling it like it is. Black Butte Ranch Restaurant, my friend, you’ve got to get your serving-time act together. Plus, what you serve has got to include a decent vegetarian entrée. Two “got to’s.” Not much to ask. You can handle it. Then we’ll keep coming back. We love looking out your floor to ceiling windows at snow-capped mountains, a meadow, grazing horses, geese on the pond. The atmosphere can’t be beat. But no matter how beautiful the setting, diners get cranky when they wait half an hour to have their order taken,…

Marijuana may stave off Alzheimer’s

Ah, excellent news today: smoking pot may prevent the progression of Alzheimer’s disease. I’m hoping the effect is long-lasting, since I inhaled enough THC in the 60’s to keep me Alzheimer’s-free for a thousand years (more or less; anyway, the whole universe could just be a speck in the eye of a Cosmic Dude who is just a speck in the eye…time’s got to be an illusion). What a trip. All these years I’ve heard, “If you can remember the 60’s, you probably weren’t there.” Now it turns out that those cannabis-happy hippie days were good for the memory. Far…

Tango, a three minute love affair

Carlos Rojas, one of our Tango instructors, says that Tango began in Buenos Aires as a human mating dance. Much as birds and other animals do, males had to compete for a limited supply of desirable females. Dancing Tango demonstrated to a woman what kind of a mate a man would be. So Carlos likes to say that Tango is simple: “It’s just a gentleman walking with a lady so she will fall in love with him.” Just as Carlos told us last night, Christine Denniston explains that in the late 1800s there was a massive influx of single male…

Airplane liquid explosives threat was overblown

Terrorism is no joke. But how the British and American governments have been responding to it often is.

That’s why it was fitting I learned about the mostly phony binary explosives threat, which was supposed to be able to bring down an airplane with a tube of toothpaste and a bottle of water, in Funny Times, which reprinted Ted Rall’s expose of the overblown Homeland Security alert that kept our flying mouths dry until TSA relaxed the rules recently.

Which was the right thing to do, since there never was much reason to be concerned that terrorists would be able to mix some liquids or gels together and bingo!, fashion a powerful bomb.

For The Register reports in “Mass murder in the skies: was the plot feasible?” how unlikely it is that anyone would be able to concoct a brew capable of bringing down a plane from liquid carry-on items. Preparation of TATP, triacetone triperoxide, the jihadist’s explosive of choice, takes some serious work.

Rall says:

“First,” wrote The Register, “you’ve got to get adequately concentrated hydrogen peroxide. This is hard to come by, so a large quantity of the three per cent solution sold in pharmacies might have to be concentrated by boiling off the water…Take your hydrogen peroxide, acetone, and sulfuric acid, measure them very carefully, and put them into drink bottles for convenient smuggling onto a plane.

It’s all right to mix the peroxide and acetone in one container, so long as it remains cool. Don’t forget to bring several frozen gel-packs (preferably in a Styrofoam chiller deceptively marked “perishable foods”), a thermometer, a large beaker, a stirring rod, and a medicine dropper. You’re going to need them.

“It’s best to fly first class and order champagne. The bucket full of ice water, which the airline ought to supply, might possibly be adequate…Once the plane is over the ocean, very discreetly bring all of your gear into the toilet. You might need to make several trips to avoid drawing attention.

Once your kit is in place, put a beaker containing the peroxide/acetone mixture into the ice water bath (champagne bucket), and start adding the acid, drop by drop, while stirring constantly. Watch the reaction temperature carefully. The mixture will heat, and if it gets too hot, you’ll end up with a weak explosive. In fact, if it gets really hot, you’ll get a premature explosion possibly sufficient to kill you, but probably no one else.

“After a few hours–assuming, by some miracle, that the fumes haven’t overcome you or alerted passengers or the flight crew to your activities–you’ll have a quantity of TATP with which to carry out your mission. Now all you need to do is dry it for an hour or two.”

The conclusion is clear: “Certainly, if we can imagine a group of jihadists smuggling the necessary chemicals and equipment on board, and cooking up TATP in the lavatory, then we’ve passed from the realm of action blockbusters to that of situation comedy.”

Yes, these days it’s difficult to separate Bush administration policies from satire. Such is Maureen Dowd’s point in a biting New York Times column about how similar George Bush is to comedian Ali G’s hilarious alter ego, Borat. (See continuation of this post).

Here’s a clip of the new Borat movie. Watch it. It’s a reminder that when Bush and company make you want to cry, a better response is to laugh at their antics. We’ve got a comical president, so why not smile some at his expense? At the same time, of course, working like crazy to elect replacements for his Republican minions this November.